PS3 Launchamabob!!! - TRANSCRIPT

EDIT: The actual video is here and the blog to comment on would be this one.

*Phoenix Wright music*

Emily: So JD we're gonna start now...no for real

JD: Ok...

3: Objection!

Emily: like with the camera on and stuff. So you go-

JD: Now?

Emily: Yeah now, so you're gonna have to close it. CLOSE THE NINTENDO PRODUCT!! Well I'm gonna close the door while I'm at it. Uhm...so I'm Emily.

3: And I'm 3.

JD: And I'm JD.

Emily: And we are--

JD: Wait, not WII. No, no not WII. The THREE of us.

Emily: Oh, oh, so...yes...the THREE of us are going to be reporting to you about the PS3 launch here in Stockton, California!

JD: Yay...

Emily: Stockton... STOCKTON...So!

3: We'll be gone [?]No more talk of this vile place.

Emily: Yeah...yeah, ok.

JD: Anyway...

Emily: Anyway...

JD: So where is the PS3 actually coming out? Like...

Emily: Here...

JD: Is it in all the stores or just, like, one of them? Or, I-

Emily: Well,

JD: It seems like there's-

Emily: I think one of our main missions will be to find out if the PLAYSTATION 3 actually exists, because I've seen pictures and I've seen-

3: It's an urban legend.

Emily: and I've seen the commercials with, like, the baby... Have you seen those?

JD: That was creepy.

Emily: I showed him. There's this baby that is like, "whoo"-

JD: And the tears roll back up into its eyes.

Emily: -and it's, like, a toy baby. And it's like, "Wawawa"

JD: And the eyes, and it's like oh my gosh, it's like straight from a horror movie or something.

Emily: And there's the one with the Rubix cube; you liked that one.

JD: The Rubix cube one is where the thing explodes and it goes all over the walls.

3: heyyyy [just a sound...]

Emily: It solves it and it like floats in the air and it's all "fshowoshs - peoukh"

JD: And then there's color all over, like paint.

Emily: Really cool.

3: You know I've always been a big fan of that PLAYSTATION nine commercial.

JD: And there's- the what?

Emily: PLAYSTATION nine, what?

3: Yeah, you remember that, when they did for PLAYSTATION 2, but they didn't do it...I dunno. Those commercials are pretty cool, but I like PLAYSTATION nine...

Emily: They're just really weird. So, I've seen those, but I think we need to get out there and see if anyone is managing to actually get ahold of some, because, I mean, everyone's heard about the shortages and I think especially in Stockton we're definitely feeling that. For instance, no one, I've called a lot of stores, and no one is doing a midnight bash, no one. Like, and if--

3: No reason to line up and get one.

Emily: Exactly! Like, I think if you go look, I mean, some places people are lining up already, but I think if you go look in Stockton you'll find that no one is even opening up early or anything. It's just sort of-

JD: It's just another day.

Emily: Yeah.

3: Yeah, there may be like, a useless line. Maybe we could like go and tell them, like, you know, like, "Hey, you guys are lining up for no...reason," but, yeah, hopefully-

Emily: Like, just so you know there are seriously like three units at this store and if you are not on this list that is like an inch long, then you're outta luck. That's seriously how it's gonna be according to who I called.

3: Hopefully we don't start any riots or anything like that, although that would be pretty good videotape...

Emily: Riots? Yeah, I hope there's some hardcore fistfights or something outside Best Buy in the morning, but I dunno.

3: Nooo!

Emily: But that's on Friday. On Thursday we're gonna try to get ahold of some store employees to see what their expectations are, and they can tell us about those three units.

3: Which they probably played them, yeah. Maybe find like, some used PLAYSTATION 3s,

JD: Already?

3: All right!

Emily: Awww.

3: That'd be cool.

Emily: Now, now.

JD: I doubt it.

Emily: And tomorrow we're gonna be probably without video, just pictures, surveying outside the dining hall. 3 will not be with us, but JD will come for a little while, and I will be there.

Emily: And I'm gonna-

3: I'll be there in spirit!

Emily: see-

JD: see what people think of the PS3?

Emily: Yeah, and see if they even know or care that it exists.

JD: And if they're planning on buying it or excited about the games?

3: When more of them come into existence.

Emily: Yeah, or if it's prohibitively expensive.

JD: I mean it is a university. We have a bunch of poor college students.

Emily: Yeah-

3: Yeah...

Emily: that's kinda how I'm feeling right now. Poor college student.

JD: Me, too.

Emily: And have you looked-

JD: It's too expensive.

Emily: Have you looked at the launch line up?

JD: It's not that great. It just...

Emily: It- I'm just disappointed in the fact that most of the games are on other consoles, too, and, I mean, it's a lot cheaper to get it on Xbox 360-

3: Mm hmm.

Emily: than on PS3.

3: Yeah, so..

Emily: But I do have to say that Resistance looks pretty damn cool.

3: I agree.

Emily: I like shooting-

JD: Can we say "damn" in this?

Emily: Huh?

JD: Can we say "damn" in this?

Emily: Yeah, we can say "damn."

3: DAMN...

Emily: I'll give you permission for that.

JD: Ok.

3: Yes!

Emily: And, what else? I dunno. But yeah, I saw some videos of Resistance and it looks very impressive.

JD: How much is the PS3 launch price?

Emily: If you want the 60 gigabytes, it's 600 bucks.

JD: The 60 GB hard drive, or?

Emily: Hard drive with...wireless...

JD: Oh, so it has a hard drive then.

Emily: Yes.

JD: And it doesn't use memory cards.

Emily: You can use a variety of memory, like if you wanna have like videos and music and stuff, you can hook up your whatever...drives and things and I think that they have adapters for like, PS2 memory cards and stuff like that.

JD: That'd be good.

Emily: Yeah, except the backwards compatability is now supposedly flawed and that makes me kinda sad. And I heard Guitar Hero fans are having trouble with their controllers. I still haven't played that game.

JD: Eh, it's worthwhile.

Emily: That's what I hear. But uh...

JD: GuitarFreaks is better, though.

Emily: Oh.

JD: But-

Emily: Well, ZELDA looks good, but that's a-

JD: Yeah.

Emily: Nintendo game.

3: Hey hey hey, none of that, none of that.

JD: But GuitarFreaks is still a PLAYSTATION game, it's just Japanese. You'd have to import for it.

Emily: Yeah. Well, importing's good. I'll import.

JD: Well, importing is good, it's just not everyone can do it.

3: Yeah.

Emily: And the PS3 already launched in Japan!

JD: Yeah.

Emily And in fact, I blogged about that the other day with my really horrible translation of that article.

3: It's ok, it's ok.

Emily: But there's-

JD: Did it get a lot of good, uhm, releases in Japan?

Emily: Uhm...

JD: I mean, were people happy about it?

Emily: I think they sold what like 84 thousand some units, like all of them that they had pretty much. [I don't remember where I read the original figure, but the 1Up story is more recent.]

3: Of course, since they made so many.

Emily: Yeah, and I guess the first, the first official sale was some Chinese fellow who didn't give his name.

3: [I think he said something in Japanese, but it is quiet, so I dunno.]

JD: Mysetery sales person.

Emily: But they had, so in my translation I was confused because they had the, uh...the verbs they were using when I looked it up it was like "cutting" or something but they had one of those balls that pop open and streamers come out.

JD: Oh, the party balls that are in Super Smash Brothers.

Emily: Yeah! Smash Brothers!

JD: Wait, wait, that's Nintendo. Yes, PLAYSTATION!

3: SHHHHH!!!

Emily: But, but Snake is gonna be Smash Brothers! AND, that is pretty much the one reason I want a PS3, Metal Gear Solid 4.

3: Suneeku! Suneeku! [katakana version]

JD: It's a snaaaake, a snaaaake, badger badger badger

Emily: Not that kind of Snake!

3: Ohhhh, it's a snake!

JD: ...on a plane.

Emily: Wow...

3: It's my bid! [? a reference to something, not sure what...]

Emily: We just reached an all-time low. How did that happen? God, I'm sorry about that. Planes and snakes...

3: It's ok.

Emily: I never thought that would happen HERE.

JD: Planes and snakes and Samuel Jackson, oh my!

Emily: Yeah, well I'm trying to think if there's anything else we should say about the PLAYSTATION 3...right now, while-

3: It's cool, but-

Emily: It's very shiny.

3: it costs money.

JD: Ooh, shiny. Shiny is good.

Emily: Very shiny.

3: Pretty, pretty, shiny, shiny.

Emily: And...but not shiny enough to be worth 600 dollars on launch day.

JD: Yeah.

Emily: Sorry, sorry.

JD: Maybe when it comes down a couple hundred dollars in price it would be worth it.

Emily: OH, I was gonna talk about why that I'm, well, the reason that I"m covering the PS3, because my name is EmaWII for a reason, and you told me just a little a while ago that you, yourself, are a Nintendo fanboy.

JD: Yup.

Emily: And-

JD: It's just, I like their stuff much better.

Emily: I know you like PLAYSTATION.

JD: The only-

Emily: And I love PLAYSTATION! I just don't have 600 dollars and the launch line up is not...

3: It's like YAYYY - AWWWW.

Emily: There's just a couple, you know, action games, and sports games aren't my thing. Like, the new Tony Hawk-

JD: Puzzle games are fun.

Emily: the animations look great, but-

3: Kick flip! Twist it!

Emily: you can play the same game on the 360 and have online stuff, too, so...it's just like...

JD: Yup.

Emily: Why? Why, Sony, why?

3: Xbox 360, it sounds like it's named after a trick on Tony Hawk, I dunno.

JD: I don't think you'd want to be doing a 360 on your Xbox, though, that might not be such a good idea.

3: But hey, that's what it's made for, doin' 360s on!

JD: Yeah, but maybe, I dunno if that's covered in the warranty.

Emily: Hmm.

3: Mm, yeah, it's probably like a super move or something. Like, you get the voltage JUST right, or yeah, it'll just explode, yeah. If you don't get that Tony Hawk face plate.

Emily: Oops, oops. So, anyhow, the reason that I'm er we're doing...me and my compatriots are doing the PS3 launch is simply there's one thing: to be ironic and contrary and because I'm out of town on Sunday. [Yeah, I know that's two or three things.]

3: Yaaaaay!

Emily: Did I tell you guys that? That's the only reason, otherwise I'd be covering the Wii launch, but the Wii launch is on a Sunday!!

JD: Who does that?

Emily: Seriously. That's-

3: Wow.

Emily: I think that about wraps it up, I think, unless anyone has anything else they'd like to say about the PS3...

3: It's cool, but it's expensive. I'm an impoverished college student!

JD: Join the club.

Emily: Club, the club is joined. So, the three of us will see you soon.

JD: Wait, three.

Emily: I said "the three!"

3: Yeah.

Emily: God! And-

JD: Three.

Emily: his name really is 3. That's what I...yeah.

3: Pokeball, go!

Emily: ...on your PLAYSTATION 3?

3: Yeah, yeah, that's how I'm gonna get one.

JD: [couldn't hear]

3: I'm poor, so I'll just capture one...in the wild.

Emily: In the wild?

3: Yeah.

Emily: "The elusive PLAYSTATION 3?"

3: Yeah!

JD: I don't know that there are any in the wild. I think the, they all are owned by trainers.

3: Dude, everybody knows there's like one mythical PLAYSTATION 3 hiding in the deep cave.

Emily: Like MewTwo?

3: Yeah, yeah.

JD: Maybe.

Emily: Only with a-

3: I'll just have to-

Emily: BETTER PROCESSOR!

3: Yeah!

JD: But I think it's more likely that you'll only come out and encounter the trainer ones and you can't use pokeballs on other trainers, so...

3: If I use a MewTwo ball I can, yeah!

------------

Yikes, that was time consuming. I added in links to some stuff. Yay.