Friday, October 18, 2013

When you read other people's 2007s

You start to want to read your own 2007.

(I have read jottings from a couple different important peoples' 2007s lately.)

It's good to blog.

In terms of epochs of my life:

1. The town life of a toddler (before I can really remember what was going on)
2. Tribal existence in a country forest with bicycle (till 6th grade, 1996)
3. 青春 (middle school and high school, graduated 2003)
4. I'm an adult (all boundaries pushed, college before Paris, pre-2005: I started blogging)
5. Paris (lots of things changed, spring 2005)
6. California dreamin' (college after Paris, finished early Dec. 2006)
7. REAL LIFE (after college, pre-Twitter, 2007, 2008, early 2009)
8. Alternate universe (June 2009-Nov 2011, but also the dreamy period after that leading up to...)
9. Yet another realm (Japan, i.e. everything since March 2012)

Here are the most important events that have happened so far:

1. Summer 1985 Born (lol)
2. 1993? Some kids back from a foreign exchange taught us how to count to ten in French and it was the coolest thing in my life up to that point. Even if Paris wasn't as huge as Tokyo in the grand scheme of things, realizing that I cared about learning languages was.
3. Spring 2000 Got up the courage to partner with a guy I liked in my math class on a project which ended up leading me straight to Japanese and also further into the Internet. (Also was my first boyfriend.)
4. Fall 2005 Inspired to start writing freelance. (By my first serious boyfriend.)
5. Fall 2007 Went to Japan for the first time.
6. Summer 2008 Paradigm shift. For better or worse, we cannot say. (Via a guy who later claimed to be my boyfriend.)
7. Summer 2009 Got hired at Twitter.
8. Winter 2012 Bought ペンギン・ハイウェイ based on the cover.

That's only 8 things. I dislike the number 8. I wonder if there are two more important things.

I guess I'd say...
x. Fall 1996 Finally got to play saxophone (5th graders were not allowed for some reason; this is not on the original list because while it was crucial to my high school years, it became irrelevant later on except for the super bitter sweet nostalgic feeling I get whenever I listen to symphonic band music or jazz.)
z. Spring 2012 Moved to Japan (but I pretty much see this as a direct extension of #7 because it would not have been feasible otherwise, and the ball was already rolling at #5. I knew I would get here, even if at the time I had no idea when or how.)

I guess there is plenty of other stuff that happened. I mean, my whole life happened.

My universe is expanding and I have my own cosmic microwave background.
Seems to make sense.

One thing I think about a lot, though, is when I will feel like I'm in "real life" again, and/or how I will know when I am. Which I realize doesn't make sense, but if there is a time that I feel was "real" then wasn't it? And isn't now not? Actually lately I'm getting closer to that feeling, but...something still seems so meta. Maybe it's because I'm living in Japan I have this film of over-awareness that I didn't have in SF? SF was raw and crazy. Japan is still crazy sometimes, but I'm watching myself from somewhere. I wonder if it's really just Japan or if it happened earlier...I wanna climb back into my skin.

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