velcro-covered facts would be helpful

notice i haven't been around much.

so right now i'm listening to Mates of State wishing i wasn't so stupid

i have a test tomorrow and i've been trying to learn all weekend and it's not working

reviewing is so pointless. if you don't know it you're not going to figure it out in three or four days.

anyhow i've been working on the textbook stuff which means i haven't even started the philosophy. well that's not really true...cuz i kinda ran through my analects notes last night which are all the book. so i kinda glanced everything over.

confucius should be easy tho.

i can't remember if we have to know xunzi and mozi and that...

but i do know we have to know laozi and zhuangzi

those i have to look over

as well as the legalist and militarist stuff

so that is what i'm doing today...

after i waste a couple more minutes

you can only look at this stuff so much...

and i still don't know the textbook stuff anyhow

even tho i spent all freakin' weekend typing notes and looking them over and readin them in my head and aloud and everything

how dumb

maybe i really hate school and just think i like it cuz i want to be something when i grow up

sooooooooo

this week is far too busy

pride week

which...i will have to miss most of it cuz i have class

but oh well

and then...

two group projects (MGM and Seven Samurai) which i will probably have to present on the same day next week...how great...

and then...

this midterm tomorrow that i will fail

i guess i have like a B+ or A- in this class right now...if i fail my midterm it will get worse...hopefully i can at least get a C...a B would be nice...even a low B would be acceptable i suppose...i dunno

i think if it's not grammar or vocab it just doesn't find a home in my head...

it's like if king wu was a knife, and my head was a watermelon...it would be the case that the knife would just glance off...like off of rubber or something...no penetration of information...it all just slides offfff

i hate feeling stupid

so ok and the gender bender is friday and i can't just wear my normal clothes even tho they are guy clothes...i have to actually dress up and i can't find anyone to lend me clothes and i honestly just don't want to waste money on thrift store clothes i will wear once. i have enough stuff to spend money on and find more all the time. i'm supposed to be SAVING. but then if i don't dress up it will be lame and pointless to go and you know i don't even WANT to go. maybe i can just set up and go home to sleep. i like my job and stuff but i have things to do on saturday and i don't really see myself having that much fun staying out friday night anyhow.

saturday is my t&i workshop. probably i should wear nice clothes but since i don't have any here i will end up wearing...flares and a shirt probably. a shirt or two or three. i dunno. bleck. and then i will have to go by myself to sf...what is the point really? hopefully the workshop will be worth it.

blah i have to go...if not to study east asian civ then to do some japanese at least...